Emotional intelligence is our capability to recognize our own emotions and those of others. This encourages the development of discernment between different feelings so we can label them appropriately. If we become able to structure our emotional information it will guide our thinking and behavior, towards easier transition into different types of environments facilitating us to achieve our goals.
While emotions are associated with bodily reactions that are activated through neurotransmitters and hormones released by the brain, feelings are the conscious experience of emotional reactions.
Feelings are sparked by emotions and shaped by personal experiences, beliefs, memories, and thoughts linked to that particular emotion.
Strictly speaking, a feeling is the side product of your brain perceiving an emotion and assigning a certain meaning to it.
In summary the difference between emotions and feelings are as described bellow…
Emotions are neuro-physiological reactions unleashed by an external or internal stimulus (emotions are physical). This explains why not being able to decompress trapped emotions as response to environmental stress can erode our cells tissue eventually creating physical and mental struggles.
Feelings are a self-perception of specific emotions, being a subjective expression of emotions (feelings are mental).
Here are some tips to improve your emotional intelligence:
1. Reflect on your emotions.
2. Assertive communication, but still respectful.
3. Ask for others perspectives.
4. Accept criticism. Ask what you can learn rather than resist.
5. Press the “Pause” button. Allow your attention to your breath, press your tongue towards the roof of your mouth (behind the front teeth) inhale deeply through your nose and when you exhale allow yourself to let go of any resistant feelings that clouds your critical thinking (the objective analysis and evaluation of an issue in order to form a judgment) process.
6. Practice maintaining your positive attitude regardless of others.
7. Respond rather than reacting to conflict. (Review tip #5).
8. Practice self awareness. Keeping attention into the present moments protects from triggers rooted from unrelated past experiences that might unconsciously boost behavior projections.
9. Explore and understand the “why.”
10. Empathize, Empathize, Empathize.
11. Be observant.
12. Hunt for the good stuff (make inventory of each emotion, looking forward to find something good or a lesson out of each life’s event).
Example:
If a job interview was suddenly cancelled and rescheduled, focus your energy thinking that the Universe is giving you more time to prepare or that it could be heavenly protection from driving on the road that specific day.
13. Journal your thoughts and emotions. It will help you reduce your stress and to learn from your experiences.
14. Allow yourself to embrace yoga. The practice of yoga helps achieve a balance within the internal and external environment, thereby seeking to attain mental, spiritual and physical well-being.
15. Practice always. If you practice at least *21 days how to improve your emotional intelligence you will see the difference making it part of your daily routine.
Last but not least;
” See thru the eyes of compassion. Listen with ears of tolerance. Speak with the language of love.” -Rumi
Author:
Glenda Lee Santos; Retired Veteran and Yoga Warrior; Criminal Justice, BA; RYT-200 hrs; Holistic Practitioner with Foundation in Yoga and Ayurveda; Reiki Master; Spirit Guide Coach; Master Resilience Trainer.
* Scientific research has shown that 21 is the required amount of days to develop cellular memory in order to create a good habit.
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